During your time in the military, likely the last thing on your mind was how likeable and approachable others saw you. You focused on the mission. You completed tasks, projects and assignments to expectations. Whether those around you enjoyed being around you, felt they could comfortably talk to you, and wanted to be your friend was not your concern. And practically speaking, that makes perfect sense.
By contrast, civilian sector employers pride themselves on having a branding and unique experience that carries through to the workplace. Brands are experiences, and companies treasure the promise of that experience meeting the needs and desires of customers, investors, employees and company leaders. Therefore, how you are at work, in addition to the quality of the results you deliver, matters a great deal.
Being approachable means others feel a degree of psychological safety around you. They can share their hopes, fears, concerns and ideas without fear of retribution, ridicule or consequences. Being approachable means you’re seen as welcoming, open, inclusive and as someone who’ll listen to learn, not to judge.
Here is how approachability plays a role in various stages of your work:
As a Job Seeker
When you interview for a new role, either as an external candidate or for an internal job or promotion, the people considering you are evaluating more than your skills, certifications and training. They’re imagining what you’ll be like to work alongside, whether you’ll bring new ideas and a fresh perspective or could potentially be standoffish.
When considering you for a role, employers imagine you within the context of their company brand. Can they envision you as an ambassador for the company values? Could they confidently put you in front of key customers? Will you lead your team with empathy and professionalism?
Approachability in the job search does not mean you become everyone’s best friend. Or that you become someone you’re not. It does mean you remove any potential barriers, such as coming across as defensive, aloof, arrogant or difficult.
On the Job
Your colleagues, boss, boss’ boss, customers and peers in other departments also need to know that you’re someone they can approach. They should feel comfortable coming to you with questions or feedback. When someone isn’t seen as approachable, the people around them might withhold critical information, and that’s never good.
As a Leader
This might be the most critical role for approachability. If your direct reports, colleagues and other stakeholders perceive you not to be approachable, they could withhold concerns, ideas or feedback that has serious consequences. Here, your goal should be to create psychological safety such that you receive even unpleasant news or feedback in time to correct the course.
When leaders are approachable, their employees feel more engaged with projects and the overall mission. They tend to be more comfortable holding themselves and others accountable and are less at risk to leave because they feel more work satisfaction.
Being approachable at work doesn’t mean being someone you’re not. Authenticity is critical, because faking approachability is easily perceived as disingenuous, untrustworthy and uncredible: toxic qualities for any leader.
Focus on welcoming new ideas and greeting people, challenges and new opportunities with curiosity instead of resistance. Feel confident that your goal of being approachable will serve you well in your post-military career.
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