As if job fairs, networking events and coffee chats weren’t tricky enough, now we must network online, too. For some, the idea of contacting a stranger from a keyboard feels easier and less personal. For others, the lack of body language cues and personality given off by a person in the flesh makes networking online feel impossible.
Virtual networking often starts with email and direct messaging or instant messaging, and it may never progress to meeting in person. The entire networking relationship may consist of written communication and a video or phone meeting occasionally.
When you meet someone in person, you can see their facial expressions, stand or sit facing them, and gauge their interest in you by what and how they speak. Virtually, it gets trickier: Emails and messages can be misunderstood, video connections can be spotty, and phone lines can be disconnected (did she hang up on me?). With virtual communication, a professional tone becomes essential. Choose words to signal respect, preparedness and seriousness, even in casual settings, as they amplify your reputation and personal brand.
Email Networking
When reaching out to introduce yourself to someone for networking purposes or to continue a networking conversation, email can be an easy and practical way to engage. Remember, though, that without verbal cues, body language and other context, email can easily be misinterpreted. For example, imagine you got this email:
“Hello, Bob. I’d like to discuss your connection to Sally. I have questions.”
Seems innocent enough, right? But what if you took that message to read this way: “I suspect something nefarious is going on between you and Sally, and before I report this to your wife — or the authorities! — we should talk.”
A very different message.
It’s important to write your messages clearly, confidently and concisely. Give all the context needed for the recipient to understand your ask and intention. You would write it this way:
“Hello Bob. Sally Jones gave me your name, as she’s assisting me with a job search. She mentions you have a deep background in software analytics, the career path I’m pursuing after my 15 years in the Navy. I would welcome the opportunity to speak with you by phone for 20 minutes, next week, to ask you some focused questions about your work at ABC Company. Here’s a link to my scheduling tool.”
By being clear about what you want (to get background on Bob’s role at ABC) and the time commitment you’re asking for (20 minutes by phone), you’re helping Bob decide if he can assist you. And, when you state your mutual connection up front, you anchor Bob’s understanding of who you are and who you know.
Every message you send tells the recipient something about you and your personal brand. In the civilian world, your reputation is greatly shaped by what you say AND how you say it. Thoughtful, well crafted communications demonstrate reliability, professionalism and trust.
Direct and Instant Messaging
Unwritten ground rules exist when it comes to reaching out on social media platforms via direct or instant messaging. Instagram and Facebook, for example, are considered social and more casual, so reaching out to a professional networking lead on those platforms could be seen as intrusive. Some people limit those platforms mostly to family and friends.
LinkedIn is a safe platform from a professional standpoint. On LinkedIn, engagement is understood to be knowledge sharing and collaboration, so reaching out to someone to ask about networking assistance is accepted and permissible.
The context on LinkedIn matters. If you ask someone you barely know, or with whom you connected years ago but haven’t stayed in touch, to help you with a job search, you might be met with reluctance. If you need to enlist the help of a past connection with whom you’ve lost touch, owning it up front is helpful. You could write: “Hello Mary. I can’t believe it’s been 5 years since we last attended the XYZ job fair and exchanged information. I hope you’ve been well. Today, I’m in need of an introduction to the CTO at your company and wonder if you would be willing to make that connection for me. If it helps to reconnect via phone first, please let me know when you have time for a 15-minute call.”
Being clear and specific about what you need and acknowledging that Mary might want to reestablish the connection with you before introducing you to someone in her network is a professional and thoughtful move.
Always stay mindful of what information is appropriate and able to be shared. Avoid including any detailed operational information, sensitive mission details or personal data that is private, not public.
When initiating or continuing a network connection via email or direct message, always remember to be direct, professional and clear. It’s easy to have your messages misunderstood, ignored or overlooked without enough context.
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